16 Things only Single Asian ladies Would Understand

single ladies

Cosmopolitan always came up with the most amazing titles and sometimes the content you can relate – 12 Problems Only You, the Single Friend, Understand is exactly what I can relate. For Asia ladies, I’m gladly to offer my interpretation of the points and add up a few more.

Let’s verify the list together:

1. Perpetual third-wheel hangouts.
[True] Be it totally into each other, can’t take the hands off each other or they are having a huge fight. Only in my case, the two loving people are my best friends. I’m happy to be the third wheel all the time and usually not just snack is around, there’s also beer and a cute puppy. Same also applies to my straight married friends, thank god for the cute kids they parent!


2. Getting pity invitations to things.
[True] Thank goodness for that! Especially during holiday seasons when most of your friends are back home spending time with significant other and family. You get extra lonely when you used to have a “hometown” to go back together with your SO and you now are stuck in Asia with a family that doesn’t really celebrate the season.

3. Getting set up with everyone’s crappy leftover friends.
[Not So True] The thing is when you reach to a certain age, even the crappy leftover friends are no longer single. You’ll just end up with other single ladies at the events and complain about how hard to find a guy and drink to whatever reason.

4. Having to hear tons of platitudes like, “You’ll find someone,” every time you talk to your friends.
[True to the MAX] “You’ll find someone.” “The best is yet to come.” “It’ll be your turn soon.” are among my top three. I know you mean it when you say it. It just gets a bit annoying for me to realise the fact that I haven’t found anyone. Maybe, I’ll find someone at the age of 90 or maybe I never find “the one”. It matters, but if that’s the way it is, let it be. Yes, thank you for being there for me! Please do continue include me in all the family events and consider me as an adapted sister or some sorts. I don’t mind =)


5. Getting asked, “Whatever happened to so and so?” like they were The One and you blew it.
[Semi-True] Luckily, my ex is still single. I would feel jealous if he’s with someone now. It’s just my nature. I do wish him well but there will be a small part of me feeling jealous. There were times when I realised all the guys I rejected in the past are all married with kids now. If it’s not right, I shouldn’t deprive the guys’ right of seeking true happiness by dominating his heart with someone who didn’t cherish it(aka, me).

6. Watching your super-happy friends in couples being super-happy. This is wonderful on some level, it really is. And on another level, a reminder that you might never have that, why, God, why.
Direct Copy & Pasting and it’s [COMPLETELY TRUE]. The sad part of me is crying over this…

7. Dinner parties where you’re sitting in between two couples because you’re the only single person there.
[Totally True] I’m used to it now. It’s couples, kids and me. I think I blend right in. That fact that I love kids helps a lot. I can direct my attention to the cutest things on earth.

8. Your friends only call you when their partners are out of town.
[Not True] I’m super lucky to have friends who do care about me genuinely and call me on a regular basis. Of course, they call me when their partners are out of town too. I’m glad to be on the caller list.

9. Your friends think all your traumatizing online dating stories are hilarious.
[True] They have been supportive and listening to my stories. OK, I’ll drop OKC. It’s Not an easy place for find meaningful relationship or even relationship to begin with.


10. Friends who tell you, “Never get married,” when they’re fighting with their partner and therefore you lose all hope in love.
[Not True] All of my friends are happy married and at least they still have faith in their marriage. That has to come down to the fact that most of my friends did get married out of love not the social pressure of getting married under a certain criteria (eg. age).

11. Your friends always want to partaaayyyy with you.
[Semi-True] They want to party with me not because they are bored in their laidback life, but also they want to cheer me up and make me feel cherished as well. Oh yes, my drinking has been cut down but still have some wild nights.

Stay cool

12. Partnered friends want all your hot single gossip.
[Not True] They do know I have no gossip and no guys on my radar. Sad, but it’s true.

Points to add up:
13. You check out the ring fingers whenever you meet a new guy at social settings.
It’s not that you are desperate, but you just automatically check out the ring finger and see if the guys’s married. We a good moral girls. Keep your hands off from the married guys.

When you see the guy’s ring finger is empty, you go like:

When you meet his beautiful wife, you go like:

14. At extensive family gathering or at school reunion, people who haven’t seen you for a while would ask “When will you invite me to your wedding?”

Sod it! I don’t even have a guy in my radar. Do you want me to marry myself and send you the invite? I know you mean no harm asking and just want to break the ice. But 8 out of 10 times you asking a single ladies, the answer would be very likely to be “I don’t have a boy friend yet.” I have to fight the urge everything to tell them not to ask me any more. If I’m getting married, I WILL TELL YOU. Not that you will be invited. Still I WILL TELL YOU. AND I DON’T MEAN IT if I Say “I don’t have anyone yet. Could you introduce someone?” I just wanted to say it to shut you up. Don’t follow up. BUT if my parents asking for something similar for me. They MEAN it.

15. “You are just too picky.” – Or the implication of ” there must be something wrong with you if you are still single.”
I don’t want to get married or partnered with simply because I’m lonely or the societal norm says so. If I mean someone who I really want to spend the rest of my life with, I’ll make a commitment. That doesn’t necessarily has to be marriage. I just haven’t met the someone who will make me settle yet. So Save your criticism and accept that fact that singlehood can be happy too.

16. “You are not getting any younger.” “You biological clock is ticking.” Especially from your parents or someone older than you.
Of course I know I’m not getting any younger. Does that mean my chance of finding love is lower? Even with child-birth which has more to relate to age, there’s a solution to it. I can freeze my eggs. So when I am finally ready to have kids (I’ll make sure the kids grow up with a loving family), I can take them out and have an IVF. That actually cease a lot of women’s nightmare.

16. Being the “Case Study” of the extensive family.
Yes, when you reach a certain age and still not married. The negative sigma attaches to you. In extensive family gathering, on the surface, they would ask you about your love life and the gossip would go around as a negative example. “Look at your Cousin, she missed her chances and now she has to be an old lady. Don’t follow her path.” etc etc.

17. “How’s your sex life?”
Non existence. It’s not NYC back in the 90s. It’s not sex and the city. Unless, I want to dress up every weekend and get my slut face on and try hitting on non super hot guys, the true is I don’t score that much, or at all. You reach an age that the clubbing/hooking up scene seems too small and you see the same people. And the thing is you don’t even the the guts to talk to guys unless you are pissed drunk. That wouldn’t make you more attractive. So, nothing. Nada. I’m not interested in meeting guys online just for casual sex. Sex life related question can be tough.
samantha quote

It’s never easy being single in any culture. The loneliness will haunt you and the overly loving coupled up friends will make you jealous. Just do whatever make you feel good and ignore what others think of you. You only have to be responsible for you own life. Done something you regretted? Learn from it and MOVE ON. Life is too short to be sad or to spend it not to the fullest to your full advantage.

Chin up, Cheer up and have fun!



My Takeaway from Yahoo OMS 2014


I’m getting old and forgetful so before I completely forget why I disappeared from my office for a whole day. Here’s a summary of my key takeaway from the Yahoo OMS 2014, Hong Kong.

2014, Hong Kong people spend avg. 148 mins daily accessing to the internet through their mobile devices, which is a 12% increase compared to last year.

Surprising? Nope. Any new engaging ad format on Mobile? Not that I’ms aware of. Tough cookie to crack.

Top 3 Tumblr countries in the world:
1. US
2. Brazil
3. Japan

56% of the users are aged 13-34 (opps, I barely make the cut, ;-p) with quite even gender distribution, 51% female and 49% male.

I’m so glad that one of the countries I look after is on the top 3. My colleague and I were discussing why Japan is so up high on Tumblr use?

My take?
1. Tumblr is similar to Twitter that you don’t have to know your followers or the people you follow. You can remain completely anonymous, which fits their overall culture of being private and shy.
2. Tumblr is a very visual appealing platform with amazing animated gifs. With the Menga culture so deeply rooted in the Japanese culture, Japanese audience is no doubt easily fascinated by the visual/animated appeals.

Your take?

Intent of Use – Facebook Vs Twitter Vs Tumblr
social comparison








Finally came Entertainment –

“Put Brands into Popular Culture and Popular Culture into Brands”

This is a key way to make your brand up to date and appeal to the current social media savvy, content seeking generation. You have to be either very funny, very touching or completely incredible to be a social media/viral babe.

Words of wisdom
Don’t tell stories for Digital.
Tells Stories. Take advantage of Digital.

Many marketers, especially digital marketers, would fall into the trap that we have to create stories for digital. Viral campaign was such a buzz words a couple years ago. However, not all videos were made with the goals of getting viral would actually make it. Truth is, many just fail. Why? You have to have a GREAT story to begin with and the devil lives in the execution. It’s not that random low quality, flash of genius video don’t get viral, but these videos were usually not made to be viral.

I was responsible for a couple of semi-failure, myself. It’s hard to have a “brand-right” viral video unless your brand is embracing the risk. “Safe” can get you nowhere.

Speaking of successful campaign, here’s the tips:

“Think like a Marketer, Act like a Producer.”

Of course. It’s much easier said that done. Let’s see how it’s done well.

The QVC’s stunt with Miss Pissy & the Great late Joan Rivers is simply genius

Act 1:
At one of the red carpet after-party, Ms. Joan Rivers, stormed out from the party with whipped cream on her face. With such a controversy personality, this potential “assault” attracted media attention. All the entertainment news was picking this up.1393683251_joan-rivers-article

Later, a “secret” clip was revealed in the internet. The “attacker” was actually Miss Piggy from the Muppet. At that moment, the public knew it’s not some common cat fights between celebrities. It’s indeed a stunt, but it’s interesting enough to keep you follow.

<iframe width=”560″ height=”315″ src=”//www.youtube.com/embed/bmjjiKSklVA” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen>

More juicy and scandalous photos here.

Act 2:
A video documenting of Ms. Rivers & Piggy’ decade-long hostility against each other came up with interviews of other celebrities, with their speculation on the fight. Of course, the celebrities were carefully chosen. My favourite has to be, the girl from “Precious”, she went like “Seeing the cake thing, just broke my heart”. Her face was priceless. – This is pure entertainment.

<iframe width=”560″ height=”315″ src=”//www.youtube.com/embed/4fxMm34ebMs” frameborder=”0″ allowfullscreen>

Act 3:
Finally, the devil was revealed – Ms. Rivers and Piggy is going to battle on who’s better by going on QVC, a traditional TV shopping channel and see who can sell more in a day. Yes, the devil is QVC. Even though at that point, you knew the stunt is for QVC, you still want to know who won. The winner, of course, is QVC, who finally can tab into the younger generation and had the most social day.


There’s even a Muppet Wiki Page dedicated to this campaign.

What else did I learn? Yes, something for fellow marketers. Listen to your audience before coming up with the idea for a campaign. It’s not something new but as a marker, sometimes, you simply get ahead of yourself and forget the basic.

  1. Make your campaign goal as simple as possible.
  2. Listen to your audience and analyze your product’s strength. Identify a topic worth the campaign
  3. Work closely with your partners – trust them and be understanding

That’s about it. Hope it’s entertaining enough and it’s something you don’t know here. Got questions, please comment and let me know.

[Must-Read] The ultimate gentlemen’s guide to style

It takes as much as effort if not more, to be a stylish gentleman as well. 

Worth reposting (fromhttp://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/the-ultimate-gentleman-cheat-sheet-every-man-needs.html):


Evening Etiquette for the True Gentleman


Guide to Wearing a Suit like a Real Gentleman



Tying a Scarf for Style and Warmth



Gentleman’s Guide to Shoes. Because Women Look at your Shoes. Yes Really.



Complete Gentleman’s Guide



Suit Tailoring for the Beginner Gentleman



Guide to Choosing the Correct Belt for the Occasion



You’re not in College Anymore. Your Clothes Should Fit Properly



Bourbon vs. Whiskey Read Carefully.



Buying (Pre-owned) Rolex Watches



Pairing the Correct Wine with Food is a Sexy Skill



Gentlemen are Remembered for How Well They Entertain



Guide to Wet Shaving (The Lost Art)



Buying an Engagement Ring Like a Knowledgeable Gent



Gentlemen Don’t Need a Guide, Just Dating Reminders



Regional Food Knowledge for the Carnivorous Gents



Rockin’ a Mustache Like a Gent



Choose the Right Color Clothes to Fit Your Personality



Gentlemen Know How to Drink Whiskey



Valentine’s Day is a Real Gent’s Time to Shine



Gentleman’s Neckwear Flow Chart



Gents Wear Tuxedos and Tie Their Own Bow Tie

PrintGentleman’s Etiquette Mantra

lost-art-of etiquette


Be a Gentleman, Not a Saint



That’s a Great Head of Hair Sir



[Chinese-Post] 早知道早幸福




sailing boat poI toi








一年的光景過去了,我依然單身。但今天的我,不再為年齡而苦惱,也不在為自己下任何的一個限期。現在回想起來,真是覺得可笑。我為什麼將自己的二十多歲的黃金歲月花費在擔憂和壓力下?現在三十多歲的我豁然開朗, 不再為自己定什麼限期,世界還有很多有趣的事情等我發掘,做自己愛做的事,活在當下。



我不反對婚姻,但反對為著順從社會和家人的無形壓力而結婚。現在的我,朋友圈裡有的家庭快樂,有的為生育而苦惱,也有已經離異的一群。愛情和婚姻不是生活的全部,珍惜自己所有才重要。奔三並不可怕。年齡只是一個數字,它沒有意義,除非你定要把壓力加誅在自己身上。過了三十,我反而樂得輕鬆,自己可以處理負面情緒, 經濟獨立,還有閒情來去去旅行,做做瑜伽和寫寫心情。

Happiness is a choice





結緍生子不是通向幸福的唯一通道。單身的你並不代表你有問題。愛生活,愛自己。 The best is yet to come. Never settle for less.

You are still a dignified lady





Moment of inspiration

Was rushing home last night with my exhausted body after a long day, when I was pushing my way through, I felt my bag hit in something. I turned around and said sorry! To my surprise, my bag hit on an electric wheelchair, but instead of an annoyed face, I was greeted by a warm smile. The gentlemen sitting on the wheelchair was paralysed. His son was with him, who is no older than 8 years old. He waved with a smile signalling my apology was accepted.

Afterwards, they speeded on. The little kid was stepping on the stand at the back of the wheelchair. He was riding like kids playing with the supermarket trolley. I felt sorry for the immobility for the gentlemen but I didn’t see any sadness on his face. I could feel his positivity and energy through their little ride.

There are things we can’t control in life but we can control how we feel about it. Happiness is a feeling and optimism is definitely an attitude.

Cheer up! Appreciate the little thing in life that make you happy. Time will tell these little things are actually what really matter.