That Awkward Moment – the Inevitable in many ‘modern’ relationships

That Awkward Moment – a movie that I wouldn’t compliment on its storyline, acting, casting etc, but the main theme is so prevalent in our life now. When I talked about this movie to someone and he had no clue about the movie title until I briefed him with the storyline. And he went like, “Ah!!! I remember this movie. I watched the trailer and decided against it.

 

Well, what can i say? It was a semi hungover night and I was too tired to go out and join my friends for drinks so I stayed in. Walk of Shame needs to be pre- ordered on Apple TV so I opted for the next chick flick on the list. 

That Awkward moment is the moment when two people in pre-relationship or a non relationship and one of the duo wants to figure out where this is leading to so it comes the awkward question of “So… where this is going?” Of course, not all relationships have that awkward moment, especially for those still holds a more traditional view on dating, love and marriage.  It rarely happened in our parents’ generation because in their generation, they did things in their sequence: 

Meet -> Get to know each other -> Hold hands-> Confirm relationship status -> Fist Base -> Second Base -> Engagement/Marriage -> Sex -> Kids (At least what it seemed to be)

Usually the guy would ask the girl to be his girl friend. After a few months, years of courtship, it came marriage naturally. It was a world without online dating, only pen pals, match makers, workmates or classmates. 

This value still holds true for some people, but definitely not many of the people around me. We belong to another generation – a generation that you find your potential partner with an mobile app or a dating site. You fight hard not to have sex on the first date. You could also have sex without any dates.  People get intimate too easily too fast and it came to a point that it’s hard to define a relationship status. There are many in-between terms like friends with benefit, fxxk buddies, ‘more than friends’ etc. There is also a dangerous type called exes sleeping together (not in my case), which almost inevitably leads to that awkward moment.

I really admired that BBC guy’s romantic gesture, whom I briefly date 10 years ago. We met on a online dating site. We went on a few dates until we first kissed and he had the sincerity and manners to ask me to be his girl friend. The gesture was sweet but not the relationship.

It was years after when I met my latest ex I experienced that first awkward moment. We both had been single for years and we met through mutual friends at a camping gathering in Ham Tin. We got close quite fast and spent some weekends together before we were a couple. It was about a month and half after that I asked this awkward question “So… are we boy friend and girl friend now?” Of course the answer was positive and we even did the cheesy thing by changing “in a relationship with” each other on Facebook. For better or worse, we stayed together for 4.5 years. Not a short time. 

I would say the one who’s asking the awkward question should be the hopeful one because he/she doesn’t know for sure the answer and still have hope that it’ll be something great. It’s also the one with less control who would ask this question.  If two people come to the consensus that they are naturally together or the general culture celebrates when two people like each other and spend a decent amount of romantic time together will automatically become a couple (I think that’s why my friend didn’t experience that awkward moment because it was in the culture), I envy them. Seriously.  

I witnessed friends who passed the awkward moment and moved onto something serious and eventually get married and have kids with their partners. It’s not about the awkward moment in the end; it’s all about how two people are in love and share the same hope for the future and values despite of all cultural differences. I just attended yet another beautiful and loving wedding yesterday. Love still exists. 

 

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Btw, apart from the plot, another thing really bugs me is that “perfect girlfriend” stereotype – smart, funny, boyish personality, gets along with his friends and worst of all – she’s so good at playing video games impressing all the guys. Agrrrr….

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One thought on “That Awkward Moment – the Inevitable in many ‘modern’ relationships

  1. Pingback: That Awkward Moment - the Inevitable in many 'modern' relationships | Tinseltown Times

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